Doorgaan naar hoofdcontent

Marathon madness

Hi guys...well here we go! I finished up my training for my first half marathon ever. Started tapering yesterday and I picked up my startnumber this afternoon. Is this really going to happen? I know it will and once again I find myself nervous and excited at the same time. I think it will hurt like hell and I know I will get to a point where I just really want to not run anymore but I also know that finishing this half marathon will be so much more than a 13.1 mile run.

This run signifies the end of a horrible year that started around august first 2012 when I lost my dreamjob. Alas I hand't seen the worst yet because last year right about this time I got my second attack of Neuralgic Amyotrophy and with that I lost movement in my left shoulder. Yet again I endured the most intense pain imaginable (I asked my partner to put a pillow over my head because I couldn't take it anymore)and after the nerves died (which is what happens) I lost the ability to lift my left arm. So the scapula alata (winged shoulderblade) was now visible on both right and left side of my back....and than I turned 40! So there I was...out of a job, no kids, 40 years of age and apart from a blissfull marriage and the best husband anyone could ever have...nothing to show for. Jobless Master of Education and that is when I felt the need to do something, to make this year count and thus I decided to run this half marathon.

And I still had not seen the bottom of that awfully deep barrel (tarpit probably feels more like it.) Because I couldn't use my arm anymore I couldn't get through a good days work and that meant I couldn't make the start-up of my own business succesful. So I had to quit that and find myself a job again. Yes I have been sad, angry,tired, lonely, lost and a lot of other things but I just never gave up. Running helped me through my physical therapy sessions and it gave me something to focus on. When everything failed and when it all went to sh*t I could still run. Even when my arms hurt so bad I couldn't sit or lie down, even when nothing in my world made sense...running did. And so I ran through it all and this sunday I will do it again. I will run through pain, tiredness, anger, sadness and I will finish. This sunday Amsterdam is my battlefield and I will live.

Reacties

Een reactie posten

Populaire posts van deze blog

The will to succeed....

Hi y'all, The world is filled with wishes, dreams, hopes and fears and I'm happy this tiny orb has all of m and yet that longing, that need, that hope for things to happen or maybe even the fear for them won't ever make anything happen. A dream alone will get you through a dark time but it won't make the night go away. Hope for better times will provide you with some sort of elastic band that might stretch a little further but it won't get you over that gap. A wish is nothing more than a whisper over candle light or a shooting star blasted into a universe that knows no sound and fears are the seeimingly unbreakable ties your mind has you wrapped in. The world won't give you anything, the universe can't hear you. People might and hopefully your mind will. Did you ever experience the absolute need to do something, no doubts nor fears about weather or not you're able to? That is exactly how I felt the first time I started training for a marathon. I wanted...
Een reactie posten
Meer lezen

Out with the old

 Hi y'all, I can't believe we're actually here again. Another year coming to a close. A year in which I started a new job, a year that took al the strength some of our dearest friends had in order for them to survive, A year that taught us caution and a year that made us realize friends are there for each other in good times as much as they need to be when someone is scattered like a broken puzzle. A year in which we learned how a pandemic changes the world and marks all of the people that went through and survived it when maybe their loved ones didn't. A year that showed us the good and the horrid face of humanity facing huge losses. A year that helped some of the people we hold so dear take a stand for themselves and stand up for their own life. A year that just yesterday made all words obsolote when it took the dad and near-to-be-ex-husband of three beautiful people in my love's family. Words just completely left the earth and nothing else matters but the silence...
Een reactie posten
Meer lezen

I will run the Damloop 2013 for ZZF

To my dear Dutch donating friends and all other readers, A new blog. It has been a while since I blogged about anything so why start now? I am fortunate enough to be one of many runners of the famous Dutch Damloop and I've taken on this 10 mile run as fundraiser for a very good cause. They're called Stichting Zeldzame Ziekten Fonds This organisations' main goal is to raise money for research on rare diseases such as Kawasaki's disease and Neuralgic Amyotrophie. Why this organisation when there are so many others? Well that is easy: Since little is known about those rare diseases research needs to be done. As we all know research is expansive and since everybody has to make budget cuts the research on these rare diseases is likely to be put on hold. But did you know in Holland most patients of a rare disease are children? And did you know that most rare diseases are life threatning or leave you (severely) impared? Did you know that in Holland 30% of the children s...
1 reactie
Meer lezen