Hi y'all,
A year ago I ran the nike women half marathon in San Francisco and since that half marathon a lot has changed and I have changed a lot. One look at this before and after picture will be more than enough proof of that. It's a game of 'spot the differences' so let's play this game. These are the rules:
1. Look at the picture
2. Write down the first three changes you can spot within one minute
So let me see If I can guess your list:
1. The distance changed (it doubled)
2. Lost (a lot) of weight.
3. Clothing / bottle in hand changed
4. The year changed
All of this is true. I have worked my ass off and lost about 20 kg (44lb) of body weight and yes that is a lot. Yes I am capable of running twice the distance now, yes my clothing changed and yes a year has passed. There's one thing though that is bothering me with this way of looking at my accomplishments. It has to do with the before and after perspective. It feels like we're saying that the me one year ago was not as beautiful, strong and capable as the me now is. This has to do with the way we perceive accomplishments and I would like to take a few moments of your time to explain why this doesn't feel right even though the compliments are meant as such.
When you look at me one year ago and focus on the before and after the first thing that springs to mind is the weight and most likely you will tell me that I look really good now and honestly it is exactly that notion that is confusing and it bothers me. On that same notion I hear you saying that the me one year ago didn't look good. That same thing happens when you tell me that I am so strong now because I ran two half marathons on one day. I know I'm stronger than I was last year and what I did is definately no small feat and I am absolutely confinced that it was amazing but running a half marathon isn't a picknick either. It takes a very strong person to run, period.
The thing with the before and after perspective is that it's focus is far from ideal. Before and after tells us that something was wrong with us before and somehow we fixed it. The before and after perspective is harmful because it exists only by the notion that you were not good enough before. It doesn't focus on all the things you needed to get where you are and the root of this whole notion is based on right and wrong. This thought isn't helpful at all.
When I created this picture I wanted to show you what has always been here: strength,curiosity, resilience, passion, determination, focus. When I look at these two finish photo's I can see that I have accomplished a lot but it isn't about losing weight or becoming a better person. There was nothing wrong with me to begin with. It's about having an adventure and seeing it through even when there are times you really really can't phantom why you started out in the first place. It is my resilience that got me back on my feet when I broke my wrist in training and when I pulled a ribcage muscle (pretty narly trust me!), it was determination that got me out of the door each morning before 07:00 on Gran Canaria, it was curiosity that helped me push my limits, it was strength that gave me the mindset to do so, it was passion that guided me through it all and it was focus that helped me reach my goals each and every time.
So instead of thinking about right and wrong, before and after, I would like to encourage y'all to think about why you want to accomplish whatever it is you are setting out to do and try to visualize what you need to get there. Ask for help, resize your prize and cut your goal into managable small pieces, Rewire your focus and embrace the fact that there is nothing wrong with you. When I write about being the best me I can be than I'm not saying that there's something wrong with me but I'm saying that I can do better without the negative self-talk. I want to be the best me each and every time I get out there without competing with myself or anyone else. I encourage y'all to live our life and accomplish something huge for you, to keep it unreal and make it happen for you.
My last run was seven days ago and I can't wait to get back out there and start again. I am well aware of the rest your muscles need after running a marathon and I am listening to the experts but it's hard. My legs are begging me to go for a run and my mind is running places I don't want it to run. I want to get started on my next adventure and it is amazing on it's own merrits. Come Tuesday the streets are mine!
That's it for now, until we read again,
As always, Love Marlies
A year ago I ran the nike women half marathon in San Francisco and since that half marathon a lot has changed and I have changed a lot. One look at this before and after picture will be more than enough proof of that. It's a game of 'spot the differences' so let's play this game. These are the rules:
1. Look at the picture
2. Write down the first three changes you can spot within one minute
So let me see If I can guess your list:
1. The distance changed (it doubled)
2. Lost (a lot) of weight.
3. Clothing / bottle in hand changed
4. The year changed
All of this is true. I have worked my ass off and lost about 20 kg (44lb) of body weight and yes that is a lot. Yes I am capable of running twice the distance now, yes my clothing changed and yes a year has passed. There's one thing though that is bothering me with this way of looking at my accomplishments. It has to do with the before and after perspective. It feels like we're saying that the me one year ago was not as beautiful, strong and capable as the me now is. This has to do with the way we perceive accomplishments and I would like to take a few moments of your time to explain why this doesn't feel right even though the compliments are meant as such.
When you look at me one year ago and focus on the before and after the first thing that springs to mind is the weight and most likely you will tell me that I look really good now and honestly it is exactly that notion that is confusing and it bothers me. On that same notion I hear you saying that the me one year ago didn't look good. That same thing happens when you tell me that I am so strong now because I ran two half marathons on one day. I know I'm stronger than I was last year and what I did is definately no small feat and I am absolutely confinced that it was amazing but running a half marathon isn't a picknick either. It takes a very strong person to run, period.
The thing with the before and after perspective is that it's focus is far from ideal. Before and after tells us that something was wrong with us before and somehow we fixed it. The before and after perspective is harmful because it exists only by the notion that you were not good enough before. It doesn't focus on all the things you needed to get where you are and the root of this whole notion is based on right and wrong. This thought isn't helpful at all.
When I created this picture I wanted to show you what has always been here: strength,curiosity, resilience, passion, determination, focus. When I look at these two finish photo's I can see that I have accomplished a lot but it isn't about losing weight or becoming a better person. There was nothing wrong with me to begin with. It's about having an adventure and seeing it through even when there are times you really really can't phantom why you started out in the first place. It is my resilience that got me back on my feet when I broke my wrist in training and when I pulled a ribcage muscle (pretty narly trust me!), it was determination that got me out of the door each morning before 07:00 on Gran Canaria, it was curiosity that helped me push my limits, it was strength that gave me the mindset to do so, it was passion that guided me through it all and it was focus that helped me reach my goals each and every time.
So instead of thinking about right and wrong, before and after, I would like to encourage y'all to think about why you want to accomplish whatever it is you are setting out to do and try to visualize what you need to get there. Ask for help, resize your prize and cut your goal into managable small pieces, Rewire your focus and embrace the fact that there is nothing wrong with you. When I write about being the best me I can be than I'm not saying that there's something wrong with me but I'm saying that I can do better without the negative self-talk. I want to be the best me each and every time I get out there without competing with myself or anyone else. I encourage y'all to live our life and accomplish something huge for you, to keep it unreal and make it happen for you.
My last run was seven days ago and I can't wait to get back out there and start again. I am well aware of the rest your muscles need after running a marathon and I am listening to the experts but it's hard. My legs are begging me to go for a run and my mind is running places I don't want it to run. I want to get started on my next adventure and it is amazing on it's own merrits. Come Tuesday the streets are mine!
That's it for now, until we read again,
As always, Love Marlies
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