Accept your nature

 Hi y'all

Let's try to not linger on what can't be changed, fret about the opinion of others or common societal rules (not including common sense social distancing and covid related rules because if you don't follow those you're just an arse in need of some serious kicking) and let's just embrace the power that lies within. The fire in your soul that makes you do whatever it is you do and for me it's running. Now this post might be a little to harsh for some delicate souls so if you're a june bug happy posts and lalaland kinda girl with flowers in your hair and wavy dresses and the big idea that everyone should try to pursuit happiness than please....do me a favor...quit while you still can and don't come crying about my rudeness. You do not have to read on....just a thought.

Still here? Good let's go:

I have given up on giving a f*ck. I no longer care what you might think of my time or my distances or the way my ass looks. I know I still can't look at myself in a mirror in the gym without all negative thoughts. I am fully aware of my double standards when it comes to myself in running or my buddies and that is okay. I have decided to give up all pretence and be deadly honest when it comes to running. I am in it for the FUN of it. I no longer wish to run faster than anyone else, I do not have to better myself I just wanna run whatever I wanna run and F*CK what anyone else thinks. Running needs to bring me joy, laughter, fun and a damn good feeling afterwards. Running isn't about being a runner in comparison because you know what?? I will never be a runner according to some of the runners that surround me and that's is not my issue. It's theirs and screw them for even saying crappy remarks outloud. 

I am done not retorting when a trainer tells me in a casual like way that trainers/coaches can not have a big butt and while saying that looking at mine when honestly that same douche is just a sack of bones covered in skin. This actually happened a few months ago (in summer)  and it was very hurtful. I wanted to tell him: "Go eat crap you dunghole! You and your idiotic ideas of healthy food are so way off that I am done trying to fit in your amazingly flawed idea of what healthy even looks like and BTW you might wanna look back every now and again to see what runners in the back are doing in stead of only paying attention to those up front because honestly YOU SUCK. You're the worst runcoach I ever met and coach is not a term anyone should ever bestowe upon you"  but I didn't and I ended up feeling bad over it for quite some time and I truely regret not having said exactly that. My best coach ever is the one that got me into being a runcoach myself and he never ever made me feel like I couldn't make it or that I wasn't good enough. Now that is what coaching should look like but most trainers/coaches are not like that and it is up to you to decide how to handle arses.....and it took me a looooong time to get to this point...

So here's what I have decided to do from now on and I am not kidding. This is me accepting my nature and I am loud mouthed, strong willed, fearless (ok not totally but basically), guns & big cars loving country chick and I am done taking crap from people I hold no actual relation to. If you're not family, not a friend or not someone I work with than you better watch your tongue because I'm calling BS and I'm not ready to make nice. Better yet: because of all the shitty arse faces in this world I am never gonna make nice again because I for the world of me just don't see why. If you ain't got something nice to say don't say nothing at all...did your mama not raise you right?? djeez! And trust me....any snarky shit remark that can easily be turned into a gaslighting shit thing will be called upon. I'll play nice if you will and if you don't than meet my true nature. I am not you, I never wanna be you, I am not gonna change for your sake and if you don't like that...well...I don't hold any relation to you so just...go.

I run because I wanna have fun and right now having fun means I have set a challenge to reach a 200km marker on the Ring Of Kerry right on december 31st. Why? Because it is the ring Of Kerry, because Ireland, because I know I can make it to another 200km before the end of 2020 and because the medal is eyeballing awesome. Today I ran a half marathon and it was probably the slowest one I ever ran and the most fun I had in times. I circled around the house in three loopes, taking pee-and-water breaks in between and even swiitching sweaters because it was COLD and the first long sleeved shirt I wore was just too thin and my arms and hands froze off. It is fun to just take time and enjoy the medal you're earning and in the end...isn't that what got you into running in the first place? Have fun??

Well today was so cold and it's been a while so I completely forgot how my chin goes numb and i lose mobility of my hands and that it takes time for that to recover oh and...thoughts on food while you run....fries and beers and than coming home eating two whole wheat sandwhiches with just fried egg on it because the mere thought of fries makes you sick. Running is FUN. Actively spending time outdoors in a watery winter sun is FUN and that should be all that matters. 

To me running this Ring Of Kerry challenge makes it easier to get up and out because I simply want to get my miles in that day. Be that in running, walking or biking. I just love how I can see myself progress on the map and knowing I've done those miles is just sheer bliss. So here's the point to my today's rambling: never let anyone tell you what a runner should look like, how fast they should be and how you should behave. You are you so you just do you and if anyone tries to snake in one of those shitty-seemingly-harmless-yet-always-hurtful-and-spiteful-comments...Look m straight in the face and flat out ask them: Why would you say that? and see what happes than...let them try crawling their way out and when they try to act innocent tell them: well thank you for your opinion but can you tell me when I actually asked for it? because I don't seem to remember I did.

And on that note I will leave you with some screenshot-pics of me on my ROK adventure

Go out, have fun and have an adventure. Make it worth YOUR while and have an amazing time!

That's it for now, until we read again

As always, love Marlies