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Posts uit 2019 tonen

Remember, let go and clear your space

Hi y'all, It is the 31st of December and for me that has always meant a great many things. It is a day of rituals for me. Growing up I learned how to tune in to the tidal waves of closure, letting go and opening up space. How do I upen op space? I run, I practice yoga and I recently started to meditate. On the last day of the year I always run so like always I ran out the year, I sprinted and let go of anger and sadness. I let go of all that is negative and toxic and I ran so fast my legs and my lungs felt like they were on fire and I nearly puked. Running out the old is my way of letting go of all that no longer helps me and by doing so creating space. When I am done with the last run of the year I take off the bling I've gathered over the year and just go over them. I have said this many times before: to me bling are memories frozen in time. Bling reminds me of great people and good times. So this year I ran little over 1000km and with that I generated 164 dollar

Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered...

Hi y'all, With the long nights and few hours of day light I find it increasingly more difficult to get up and get my runs in. I know I always feel so much better after a good run but I think there actually might be some scientific evidence to my general notion that my energy level tends to drop in these darker days. How about you? So what do I do about it? I am fortunate enough to work from home 3 days a week which means I can use my normal rush hour commuter hours for training purposes.  I still hate getting up early and in wintertime it feels even more like I am waking up at the merde butt crack of dawn but winter has so much more going for me than just the dark against me. For instance: - Way better temperatures to run in. I absolutely love the sting of a good crispy frostbitten morning when all is quiet and the sun is just about to get up and sparkle the crap out of everything without making me feel like I've a melting tomatoe for a face. - Nothing gets rid of horri

It's beginning to look a lot like christmas

Hi y'all, Best time of the year when everyone comes home. With all that christmas cheer it's hard to feel alone. Putting up the christmas tree with friends who come around. It's so much fun when christmas comes to tooooooown! Bring on the stockings, the advent calanders, the cookbooks, the big mugs of hot whatever content, the frosty runs, the dark cozy nights with the calming flames of yule logs (be them the netflix kind or the ones in bucket in your yard), stargazing, feel-good christmas movies, friends and family, love and laughter. This is my favorite time of year. The lights, the music, the food, the all that is december and the all that is peace and quiet. Each and every year I pray for snow to fall so all becomes quiet and calm and everyone embraces the miracle that is midwinter. For me running december means I get to look back at runs I ran accompanied my the love of my life, sometimes with friends and sometimes alone. Some runs good, some bad. Each and every

Cheering The Big Apple

Hi y'all, Last weekend I watched the masses pass me by running the big one in the Big Apple and as I stood there thinking about running and that one other thing ( I should have been on that road) I screamed and I rooted for them. I wanted to let each and every runner know that I believed in them. That they could do it. Somehow cheering others on helped me not feeling so bad for not running it myself. Better yet: in stead of sadness I felt so proud of  our group of ALSrunners. The small group of five fundraising runners that worked their asses off the last few months on each and every training, who overcame some very real obstacles and who showed up each and every time. Months of working towards that one moment in time when all of it needs to come together. When we got on that plane to JFK the feel of adventure was as tangible as a lightning storm about to release it's awesome power. Excitement, fear, joy ..all of it. The weird thing about being away from home with a bunch o

watching my oars drift off

Hi y'all, Last Sunday I ran Eindhoven, the half. Not the full. You all know I had my doubts about running a full since the summer heat but in the end that was not what tipped me in deciding against running the full. In the end I ended up having quite the scare ending up in the emergency room stuck to a heartrate monitor being probed and poked for blood. I was working from home that particular day and out of the blue I started having chest pains that I can only describe as severe and quite painful muscle cramps. I flared up and I got very naucious to the point where I literally thought IS THIS IT?! I called my husband because I was afraid my GP would think it was a heart attack and sent me to the next village where we actually have an emergency room (because my town doesn't)...let this sink in....I didn't wanna get shipped to a hospital because I was scared it was my heart which immediatly would mean the end of running season. Yep...stupid. My man got quite clear, using hi

Mind the games

Hi y'all, The caption of this post acts as a spoiler alert, just in case you didn't pick up the hint ...there's one! This past week didn't have any really long long runs scheduled. I ran little over 30km devided in 3 runs, walked a 21.5km walk and trained twice for the Amsterdam City Swim in open water. So easy breezy there. Got myself two new pairs of Hoka One One Clifton 6 and I've tested both this week. Still very much like the lightness of the shoe and the bouncyness of m but on runs onder 20km there really isn't anything I can say for realsies about how I like m than but for now....awesome. This past week involved games....a lot of m. As you might remember by my last post I'm not all together that sure I can make it all the way through an entire full marathon. I wanna run it but I'm no longer really sure why. I don't have to proof myself to anyone but me, however the world contains a lot more humans than just me. As y'all might know...I&

The end of marathongirl?

Hi y'all, Marathon training is now full on with longer long runs currently at + half marathon distances and with that doubt is kicking in. Last week on one of my short tempo runs (so that's an 11k) I actually tripped over my own foot and smashed hard onto the concrete path that runs through one of the woods I live nearby (maybe it's a park). Luckily I wasn't holding a bottle and luckily I had my man riding his bike right behind me. I immediatly got up, checked everything, used precious water to clean my chafed hands and knees and kept running but that fall shook me up. It somehow seems that my mind is struggling to keep away from the pain and trust me...My legs and butt hurt when I run +half marathon. Last Sunday I was scheduled for a 22k run, a wee over half but my body was protesting so much and it was so frekking hot I got mad, really mad and wanted to throw in the towel. I ended up walking-trashtalking myself-running and repeat. Finally at 2 hours and 45 minute

Why summer sucks!

Hi y'all I'm probably gonna be the most impopular person this orb we call earth has ever seen (okay I can think of a few humans worse than me but still...) most people will not like my next sentence and I'm probably gonna break some feeble little feelings but I don't care. I need to say this: SUMMER SUCKS BALLS!! Why? Well first off: it is either too hot to have a nice run which means you have to get up at ungodly hours just because you do have that training sessions going on because fuck yeah...marathon ain't gonna frekkin run itself..OOOOR all hell ends up right above your head leaving you drenched to the bone and completely moritified because of that incredible thunderstorm you got caught up in. And than there's the BUGS. So many frekking bugs....My arms have been under attack by f if I know what kind of asshole bug but it ITCHES....soooooo badly....it itches like there's bugs crawling under my skin. I am not kidding you!! AND to top it off....I ATE A

Holding expectations

Hi y'all, When in training for a marathon not all is fun and games and as I once again noticed just last week running is very much a state-of-mind thing next to a fit-thing. And I had a decent encounter with quite a life-lesson called disappointment. The entire week seemed to be steering towards the subject of it and I found myself in conversations on the subject regarding running and real-life. Why? Because I threw in the towel on my long run last Sunday. I just couldn't get to the let-it-go and push-through part of my brain and my legs seemed to go through some kind of spontanious combustion thing. The entire run left me frustrated, in pain and very disappointed. That kind of frustration is something I learned to go through and let go of it quickly because there's literally no use crying over spilled milk is there? But than someone threw this quote at me and I got kinda angry Why? Simple: first of all I do hold standards and yes I expect great things from me and

On heat, dresscode and badges

Hi Y'all, Summer is officially here and today I've started my second half of marathon training and just today temperatures went up to 30C / 86F so today I wanna write about a few things. First off all...dresscode. Let me start by saying: can we just agree to never ever tell another human what to wear in summer? Why because I'm annoyed/bothered by the fact that bodyshaming is still a thing. I am going to  be blatently rude so if you can't take it than please stop reading now. Continue and do not say I didn't warn you. I'll have non of this ever again and I will speak up if you do it in front of me. You kept on reading. Good. I can't be held responsible for your long toes so if I step on m than that's not my problem. Here we go: if you connect bodyshape to either beauty or fitlevel or godforsake both than you are an asshole. Yes you are and you need to stop. Surviving the heat when running (or just going to the beach or the office for that matter) o

Halt to hold happiness

Hi Y'all, when out on long runs with my man next to me we talk. Those hours out together make me so happy and I feel so blessed to have this beautiful, caring, fun loving, supportive man in my life. He doesn't only believe in equality for men and women; he carries it out. He encourages me to step up my game and believe in myself all the way. He doesn't ask me to give up anything in stead he asks me what he can do to help me get to whatever goal I have set for myself. It is exactly that undoubted and rock steady trust and companionship that makes me wanna do better, be better. In both my running and my real life I have discovered that being happy is not something that comes to you. It is something you have to actively pursuit. How so? Life isn't always good. It can be truely hard even and some days not getting up ever again feels like thé single best answer to all of your shit. But honestly it isn't. Desperation and negativity can follow you around, stick to

The will to succeed....

Hi y'all, The world is filled with wishes, dreams, hopes and fears and I'm happy this tiny orb has all of m and yet that longing, that need, that hope for things to happen or maybe even the fear for them won't ever make anything happen. A dream alone will get you through a dark time but it won't make the night go away. Hope for better times will provide you with some sort of elastic band that might stretch a little further but it won't get you over that gap. A wish is nothing more than a whisper over candle light or a shooting star blasted into a universe that knows no sound and fears are the seeimingly unbreakable ties your mind has you wrapped in. The world won't give you anything, the universe can't hear you. People might and hopefully your mind will. Did you ever experience the absolute need to do something, no doubts nor fears about weather or not you're able to? That is exactly how I felt the first time I started training for a marathon. I wanted

Point break

Hi y'all, This post might get a little poetic, a little vague and even a little spiritual but in the end, life itself is a very long run and the only thing you can do is prepare yourself for the bad parts if that is even possible. Figuring life is a long run you might consider life is a sunday. Some Sundays are dull, dreary and grey. Some are quiet, mystical and freezing, some are buzzing with bees and the smell of a barbecue in a neighbouring garden, some are only goof for crawling under a blanket shutting out the world and than there a Sundays that seem to be made for epic adventures. With that in mind are you ready to join me in my cart spireling down the depts of Gringots with an uncertain vault content? If you are you might need a little sprint and a jump because I'm off. If you are not all that interested in my poetic/spiritual ramblings by all means stop reading right now. [inserting time for you to make up your mind] Good! You're still here. Now let's g

When life tries to mess with a marathon girl

Hi y'all, I'm a huge fan of quotes and wisdom and other idiotic phrases that correctly state whatever it is I'm going through be it motivational, hilarious, iconic, sarcastic or even ironic. Just love m. And today this quote acurately reflects my state of mind: Why? Because life once again tried to mess up everything. Seriously mess it up again and it got me back on high alert with emergency overnight bags packed in the trunk of my car just in case we needed to rush to the hospital again. What that does to me? I become the wolve with teeth smiling at you not in a nice way. I become the NOT TODAY MUGGLE FUCKERS...I will find you and I will end you Liam-kinda-of-killer. I become the one person you really do not want to meet. I become the croc-brain-marathon-girl on survival with hightened senses and the will to kill if need be. Why? Because I am a runner and you will not mess with my loved ones. Running has provided me with the strength to overcome obstacles, the wil

On end of lent and new beginnings

Hi y'all, It is done. I made it all the way to Easter. fourty days of LENT and even no shortcuts on weekends. Seriously rocking THE Esther method all the way up to easter and now it is time to tell you what that has brought me: To begin with I've had good scale days and asshole scale days but in the end the number dropped 4 kilograms over the course of the past six weeks and that is a good thing. My runs are only now starting to gain in distance so not losing that amount of weight within in shorter time frame is only a good thing. Plus the number on the scale doesn't objectify my beauty or athletic skill. It does however enhance my endurance and speed and that is something I clearly noticed a few times already. I am positive and determined to keep going. Which brings me to my next thing: this end is not a real end. This 'thing' has just started and I am ready! The end of Lent marks the beginning of my second stage of marathon training (within about 6 stage

Winter is coming.....AGAIN!

Hi y'all, Long distance running takes all kind of people and doesn't distinguish at all. We runners unite through the same kind of crazy that only a runner gets. a specific kind of WOOOHOOO related to those long distances and races. Crazy you say? Why ...I'd say! What kinda crazy? Well... Early morning runs even when you really hate early and morning and people on those early mornings. Late night runs when you really wanted to slouch on the couch but you can't because your legs are twitching like hell. Long runs when all you can think of is what you'll be eating when you come home; pickles on rye bread, banana and cheese toasties, butter milk by the gallon, eggs and cheese...OMG just cheese....or steak even when you're a vegetarian, chocolate milk and cookies, skyr with all the berries you can muster, salmon...just raw salmon an entire slice, pickled onions or the just the juice straight from the jar....Need I go on? Yes because you know what? Once you a

When the fourth is with you

Hi y'all Week four has come and gone and it has been one huge trip to crazyville during week 3 and 4. To begin with: my marathon training schedule isn't synced with my 40-days-of-Esther schedule so I constantly end up logging the wrong week number either on my Esther plan or on my marathon plan and it is frustrating, but not a biggie... Work has been the biggest challenge in realizing my daily goals. How does one tackle a workweek with over 60 hours of work (yes that is 18 more than I'm supposed to do) with a marathon+food plan?  The answer is: plan it all and be flexible. But how does that work when it so clearly seems to be contradictive? Change the way you look at your weekplanner and your goals. Make sure you prioritize on your goals. Think about the work-outs that count and definately do those. Use your lunchtime, if it is possible than try and figure a way out to be more flexible in your work hours, use the way to and from work as training sessions, if you

It takes two

Hi y'all Been lenting for two weeks now. Yes lenting is a verb, who knew right? So how have I been doing? well this morning the scale was less of an a-hole and granted me -1.1kg so hopefully that number will slowely go down over the course of the next weeks. The number however is just a number and will not be the center of my attention. Yes I want to lose weight but not because I wanna be Barbie.  Though admittedly so this feminist icon is just beautiful. Losing the weight makes it easier to run and that my friends, trust me, is what I want. Easy! Because seriously the pain that hits you around mile 20 is bad enough and A-NY-THING to make that less, is worth going all-in for. So me and the gym are back on with a 6 weeks training plan for strength and today I did my first official one. Back to being the noob on the floor and just not caring about it. So what if I don't what all the machines are and I need to ask? So what if I have to start up with baby weights looking li

Lent me your ear. I'm one week in....

Hi y'all, Do you ever get that feeling that the universe is trying to tell you something? That there are just too many coïncidences for you to keep seeing them as such? Right that about sums up week 1 of Glinda-the-Good and marathon training. Last week I told you about the new huge and awesome goal I had to find. Well I can let you in on part  one of the secret because part two isn't open for registration yet. I have registered for another race to mark the half-way point in training. I will run the Amersfoort HALF marathon June 16th. About 4 months months later somewhere on this planet I will run a full one and it scares the shit out of me because this marathon is not one where you can hide behind about 10.000 other runners. This one doesn't have that many runners. So I am scared. Yep. Again. Marathon drama was there the minute I said the magical words outloud...MA-RA-THON and badaboooom DRAMAAAAA. The first thing that happened was that my company (a charity) de

Loving Lent

Hi y'all, Without y'allst knowing about it I've been working on a course called personal leadership and by doing this I seem to get closer to finding the me after it all . The gaping wounds that scorched my soul and left me switching from feeling the love and gratitude to feeling utterly at drift in the midst of a stormy neverending ocean of pain, tears and anger...those wounds somehow seem to have created a thin and fragile layer of new skin on them and my raft seems to have drifted into calmer waters. Since I shifted my focus from the dark waters to the brighter lights of positivity I find myself looking out, wanting to venture out, longing for the road and the adventures of a new goal. In my last update I told you that all I had to do was find  a new huge and awesome goal first and than come up with a plan. I did not however anticipated on the plan being there before the goal but there you have it....The plan is here and I know my goal but just not yet the time